19.12.10
Old is gone, new is come
So, I have to admit I haven't been doing my challenge for a few days because I have been discouraged by the darkness and deceitfulness of my heart. I would fight to not be negative and find myself doing so anyway. But, the truth is that the old is gone and the new has come. That is not who I am in Christ. I am so thankful for a God who shows me this over and over. I will resume the challenge tomorrow.
14.12.10
Oops, missed a day posting
Sorry I missed a day posting (though I have no idea who I am apologizing to because I know no one reads this blog) I was busy with work stuff yesterday. I had my first modeling go see. Anyway, thoughts on day 3.
Beginning thoughts: Day 3 was REALLY hard. I really struggled with not being negative. I'm sure the lack of sleep and grouchiness that my once a month joy brings along were much to blame - but regardless of where the blame lies (in my sin, always) - it was hard. I struggled a lot with it. I struggled with being apathetic toward the challenge and allowed myself some "gray" area. Things that weren't exactly negative. But as day four points out (and I had already realized) just because something isn't negative doesn't mean it is edifying. So much of my interaction with Sean is in the "gray" area. I'm praying for help from God to only use edifying speech. I need to be more edifying in what I say and less "gray".
Day 4 (yesterday) and 5 (today):
Day Four:
"...let him labor, working with his hands what is good..." Eph. 4:28
We are all accountable for the things we say, both negative and positive words. Have
you embraced the challenge to speak only positive things to your husband and to others
about him? Here's a suggestion that touches the core of your husband's world.
Some women take their husband's career for granted, and they show it in many ways.
Do you "dump" on your husband at the end of the workday, or do you strengthen and
encourage him with your words? A wise wife will make her husband feel that she values
and appreciates his work. Let him know that you are glad he is a hard worker. Take
opportunities to praise his diligence and resourcefulness to others.
If your husband is out of work, unable to work, or refuses to work, you'll need to be more
creative. Praise him for a character quality that you see in him that would be a vital part
of a successful career - such as persistence, decisiveness, strength, an analytical mind,
organizational skills, good with people, good listener, determination, etc.
Day Five:
"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for
necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." Eph. 4:29
Another way to describe the positive side of this "30-Day Encouragement Challenge" is
by using the word "edify," which means, "to build up." Negative comments only
discourage and tear down. Positive comments encourage and build.
Do you edify your husband before others, adding to his value in their eyes? This is
especially important to other family members.
Do you praise your husband to his relatives, and yours? Does your husband's mother
know how much you love him? How about your dad? Perhaps you can drop a word of
praise into a conversation or letter. Be creative in letting your relatives know that you
respect your husband, love him, and support him - in spite of whatever flaws and
weaknesses he may have.
(I am good at not saying negative things about Sean to others, Praise God. That is something we instilled in the dating phase - but I do need to work on intentionally saying good things to family and such about him. I will make sure to do that as the holidays approach, Lord willing)
Beginning thoughts: Day 3 was REALLY hard. I really struggled with not being negative. I'm sure the lack of sleep and grouchiness that my once a month joy brings along were much to blame - but regardless of where the blame lies (in my sin, always) - it was hard. I struggled a lot with it. I struggled with being apathetic toward the challenge and allowed myself some "gray" area. Things that weren't exactly negative. But as day four points out (and I had already realized) just because something isn't negative doesn't mean it is edifying. So much of my interaction with Sean is in the "gray" area. I'm praying for help from God to only use edifying speech. I need to be more edifying in what I say and less "gray".
Day 4 (yesterday) and 5 (today):
Day Four:
"...let him labor, working with his hands what is good..." Eph. 4:28
We are all accountable for the things we say, both negative and positive words. Have
you embraced the challenge to speak only positive things to your husband and to others
about him? Here's a suggestion that touches the core of your husband's world.
Some women take their husband's career for granted, and they show it in many ways.
Do you "dump" on your husband at the end of the workday, or do you strengthen and
encourage him with your words? A wise wife will make her husband feel that she values
and appreciates his work. Let him know that you are glad he is a hard worker. Take
opportunities to praise his diligence and resourcefulness to others.
If your husband is out of work, unable to work, or refuses to work, you'll need to be more
creative. Praise him for a character quality that you see in him that would be a vital part
of a successful career - such as persistence, decisiveness, strength, an analytical mind,
organizational skills, good with people, good listener, determination, etc.
Day Five:
"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for
necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." Eph. 4:29
Another way to describe the positive side of this "30-Day Encouragement Challenge" is
by using the word "edify," which means, "to build up." Negative comments only
discourage and tear down. Positive comments encourage and build.
Do you edify your husband before others, adding to his value in their eyes? This is
especially important to other family members.
Do you praise your husband to his relatives, and yours? Does your husband's mother
know how much you love him? How about your dad? Perhaps you can drop a word of
praise into a conversation or letter. Be creative in letting your relatives know that you
respect your husband, love him, and support him - in spite of whatever flaws and
weaknesses he may have.
(I am good at not saying negative things about Sean to others, Praise God. That is something we instilled in the dating phase - but I do need to work on intentionally saying good things to family and such about him. I will make sure to do that as the holidays approach, Lord willing)
12.12.10
Dia Tres
Beginning Thoughts: Yesterday was much easier than the first day. God was just so faithful in helping me. I am so thankful for that. This is a verse I have been trying to meditate on:
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, only such a word as is good for edification, according to the need of the moment. Ephesians 4:29
It is not only about not saying negative things - it is also about only saying positive things. I found myself yesterday making "in between" comments. Comments that weren't necessarily negative, but that weren't edifying either. I shall work on that.
It's amazing how a change in me sparks a change in hubby also. Yesterday he apologized for speaking negatively to me (remember, he knows nothing of this challenge). I was so taken aback - I had no idea where that came from - but it was cool to see that.
He also has taken the compliments very well - really being so thankful for each encouragement. It's great! Thank God for what He is doing!
On to day 3!
Day 3:
"...love suffers long, and is kind..." 1 Cor. 13:4
"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ
Jesus." Phil. 4:19
Love indeed suffers long and is kind. As you consider your Encouragement Challenge,
determine today that you will not say anything negative to or about your husband.
Speak kindly to him with words of genuine encouragement.
If your husband is considerate of your needs, let him know that you have noticed. Thank
him for his kindness and consideration. Thank the Lord that your husband knows how to
be both tough and tender.
Sometimes it's difficult for a man to be gentle, kind or tender - especially if he hasn't had
role models in these areas. If he's not a considerate person, appeal to him for help
without complaining. Let him know that it's hard for you to handle some things alone.
Then, when he moves in to help, don't insist that he do it your way. Be glad that he is
responding, and express your gratitude.
Ultimately, you can't expect your husband to make you feel more secure, loved, etc.
Remember that only God can meet the deepest needs of your heart.
Ways Sean is considerate: He is always there for me when I am upset. If I ever am having trouble sleeping he always offers to go to the couch and sleep there so I can fall asleep more easily. He will make dinner when I'm tired or just of his own initiative. He is always willing to help out with household things. (Along with many others). In general - he's the best!
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, only such a word as is good for edification, according to the need of the moment. Ephesians 4:29
It is not only about not saying negative things - it is also about only saying positive things. I found myself yesterday making "in between" comments. Comments that weren't necessarily negative, but that weren't edifying either. I shall work on that.
It's amazing how a change in me sparks a change in hubby also. Yesterday he apologized for speaking negatively to me (remember, he knows nothing of this challenge). I was so taken aback - I had no idea where that came from - but it was cool to see that.
He also has taken the compliments very well - really being so thankful for each encouragement. It's great! Thank God for what He is doing!
On to day 3!
Day 3:
"...love suffers long, and is kind..." 1 Cor. 13:4
"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ
Jesus." Phil. 4:19
Love indeed suffers long and is kind. As you consider your Encouragement Challenge,
determine today that you will not say anything negative to or about your husband.
Speak kindly to him with words of genuine encouragement.
If your husband is considerate of your needs, let him know that you have noticed. Thank
him for his kindness and consideration. Thank the Lord that your husband knows how to
be both tough and tender.
Sometimes it's difficult for a man to be gentle, kind or tender - especially if he hasn't had
role models in these areas. If he's not a considerate person, appeal to him for help
without complaining. Let him know that it's hard for you to handle some things alone.
Then, when he moves in to help, don't insist that he do it your way. Be glad that he is
responding, and express your gratitude.
Ultimately, you can't expect your husband to make you feel more secure, loved, etc.
Remember that only God can meet the deepest needs of your heart.
Ways Sean is considerate: He is always there for me when I am upset. If I ever am having trouble sleeping he always offers to go to the couch and sleep there so I can fall asleep more easily. He will make dinner when I'm tired or just of his own initiative. He is always willing to help out with household things. (Along with many others). In general - he's the best!
11.12.10
Whistle while you work
Day Two:
Beginning thoughts: Last night, after I wrote my post Sean and I had a fight. It was amazing how much faster the fight ended when I only had kind things to say.
Challenge: "...through love serve one another." Gal. 5:13b
How did you do yesterday with your first day of blessing and encouraging your
husband? Was it easy? Was it hard to hold your tongue when you wanted to say
something negative? We hope you're off to a good start. (If you blew it, don't give up -
start again today!) There are so many practical things you can praise, if you look for
them.
Today, find some way that your husband is serving you or your family. Does he help
around the house? Take care of the car? Fix things that are broken? If your budget
allows, give him a new, small tool with a big bow attached. But make sure he doesn't
think it's part of a "Honey Do" list!
2
Maybe your husband's not a handyman, but does he run errands for you? Let you go
first? Take care of you when you are sick? Help you make decisions? Praise him for his
willingness to serve others. Let him know that you see his unique service as a great
strength.
Sean is a great servant - today should be easy. The encouragement part at least. To be continued.
Beginning thoughts: Last night, after I wrote my post Sean and I had a fight. It was amazing how much faster the fight ended when I only had kind things to say.
Challenge: "...through love serve one another." Gal. 5:13b
How did you do yesterday with your first day of blessing and encouraging your
husband? Was it easy? Was it hard to hold your tongue when you wanted to say
something negative? We hope you're off to a good start. (If you blew it, don't give up -
start again today!) There are so many practical things you can praise, if you look for
them.
Today, find some way that your husband is serving you or your family. Does he help
around the house? Take care of the car? Fix things that are broken? If your budget
allows, give him a new, small tool with a big bow attached. But make sure he doesn't
think it's part of a "Honey Do" list!
2
Maybe your husband's not a handyman, but does he run errands for you? Let you go
first? Take care of you when you are sick? Help you make decisions? Praise him for his
willingness to serve others. Let him know that you see his unique service as a great
strength.
Sean is a great servant - today should be easy. The encouragement part at least. To be continued.
10.12.10
30 day challenge
So, I need to be more encouraging as a wife. I struggle with thinking negatively and speaking negatively to my husband. That's why I'm embarking on this challenge and documenting it here. Day One: Here we go.
The challenge:
* You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband, or to anyone else.
* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else.
Day One:
Day One:
"The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does
him good and not evil all the days of her life." Prov. 31:11-12
To refresh your memory...here's the 30-Day Encouragement Challenge...for the next 30
days:
* You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone
else, about your husband.
* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your
husband...and to someone else, about your husband!
To help you get started, have you ever thanked your husband for "choosing you" above
all other women? He found you attractive as a person, and appreciated you. Though
many circumstances in your marriage may have changed, let your husband know that
you are glad God led you together, and that you want to be a blessing to him for the rest
of your marriage. Let him know that he can trust you to be in his corner.
One of the best opportunities to express your gratitude is first thing in the morning. How
do you greet your husband each morning? Is he confident in your love? Give him a
"wake up call" that he'll never forget-a big "I love you" and an "I'm so glad I'm your wife!"
Thoughts on today: Today was hard. I don't think I really realized completely how negatively I spoke to Sean until I had to abstain from it. I mean, I knew I was negative but there is nothing like having to abstain from something to realize how often you do it. It was good to see a tiny change in heart though - because when you are intentional about thinking and doing positive things toward people - you can't help but see your attitude toward them change. He thanked me for telling him thank you for choosing me ... and though it is not about the thanks, that was nice. Anyway, it's late and I'm writing this covertly so he doesn't see me. So sorry if it doesn't make much sense. Until tomorrow. Much love.
Kelsey
The challenge:
* You can't say anything negative about your husband . . . to your husband, or to anyone else.
* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband . . . to your husband . . . and to someone else.
Day One:
Day One:
"The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does
him good and not evil all the days of her life." Prov. 31:11-12
To refresh your memory...here's the 30-Day Encouragement Challenge...for the next 30
days:
* You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone
else, about your husband.
* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your
husband...and to someone else, about your husband!
To help you get started, have you ever thanked your husband for "choosing you" above
all other women? He found you attractive as a person, and appreciated you. Though
many circumstances in your marriage may have changed, let your husband know that
you are glad God led you together, and that you want to be a blessing to him for the rest
of your marriage. Let him know that he can trust you to be in his corner.
One of the best opportunities to express your gratitude is first thing in the morning. How
do you greet your husband each morning? Is he confident in your love? Give him a
"wake up call" that he'll never forget-a big "I love you" and an "I'm so glad I'm your wife!"
Thoughts on today: Today was hard. I don't think I really realized completely how negatively I spoke to Sean until I had to abstain from it. I mean, I knew I was negative but there is nothing like having to abstain from something to realize how often you do it. It was good to see a tiny change in heart though - because when you are intentional about thinking and doing positive things toward people - you can't help but see your attitude toward them change. He thanked me for telling him thank you for choosing me ... and though it is not about the thanks, that was nice. Anyway, it's late and I'm writing this covertly so he doesn't see me. So sorry if it doesn't make much sense. Until tomorrow. Much love.
Kelsey
16.7.10
2 reasons not to get an office pet
Fish # 1: Let me introduce you to Paco. He became a member of my office in September of 2009. He was a very smart red betta. He would follow my finger around. One day I was typing, looked over, and his tank was empty. He jumped out of his tank and was on the floor. I quickly put him back in his tank and surprisingly he survived. I was so happy my little Paco was such a trooper. The next day while I was on my lunch break Paco again escaped from his tank! This time though he wasn't so lucky because my husband was in quest of brownies under my desk. He stepped on poor Paco. It was the ordeal of the office with all of my coworkers in the room screaming and poor Paco trying to swim after being stepped on. My husband denied he'd stepped on Paco, but the blood and fish guts on his shoe was enough proof for me. I made him promise to buy me another fish.
Fish # 2: My sweet husband bought me a second gorgeous blue betta. When we first purchased him for about a week he wouldn't eat. I refused to name him because I didn't want to get attached if he was just going to die from not eating. On the day of our first month anniversary of marriage it was a joyous day (because of the wedding celebration) as well as the fact that my fish ate for the first time that day! I decided at this point to name him Nolan after Nolan Ryan, my favorite Texas Ranger pitcher. Nolan was an incredibly fast fish and this is why he earned this honorably name. Nolan and I bonded and became friends. This morning when I was lovingly cleaning his water little, poor Nolan swam .... right into the garbage disposal. After about a half hour of trying to rescue him, I finally deserted my poor fish to his demise.
The moral of the story either is: Don't get office pets.
Fish # 2: My sweet husband bought me a second gorgeous blue betta. When we first purchased him for about a week he wouldn't eat. I refused to name him because I didn't want to get attached if he was just going to die from not eating. On the day of our first month anniversary of marriage it was a joyous day (because of the wedding celebration) as well as the fact that my fish ate for the first time that day! I decided at this point to name him Nolan after Nolan Ryan, my favorite Texas Ranger pitcher. Nolan was an incredibly fast fish and this is why he earned this honorably name. Nolan and I bonded and became friends. This morning when I was lovingly cleaning his water little, poor Nolan swam .... right into the garbage disposal. After about a half hour of trying to rescue him, I finally deserted my poor fish to his demise.
The moral of the story either is: Don't get office pets.
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