You silly goose....

Last night I had a dream about Brandon (If you don't know who I am referring to go back to my entry titled life and death). It was so real that I didn't realize until the middle of the Church service this morning that it was only a dream. All I remember of the dream is that he was smiling. One of his huge, genuine, but still goofy smiles. One like this...



or one like this....



God gives to His beloved in their sleep.... and I really think this was a way that He blessed me with one last encounter with a dear brother. To bless me in a way that really encourages me to fight to finish strong in the faith, as Brandon did. It is so strange to know that he isn't here anymore. I can't just run into him at Paradigm or hang out with him when I go visit OU. I know that though he isn't here, he is in a place where true Joy reigns. Where he can be even more joyful than these pictures portray.

Oh Lord, I am so thankful that You conquered death so we could have eternal life and assurance that will sustain us through the hardest times here on Earth. You are so good. We love You and praise you, even in the hardest of times.

"For the righteous will never be moved, he will be remembered forever." Psalm 112:6

And you thought it was over?

Let me set the scene for you.

It was around 2000 years ago. The prophets of old had been foretelling for a long time the coming of a Messiah, a Savior who would set the people free from oppression. A child was born. This child grew up performing miracles and proclaiming he was the long awaited Savior. A camp of people began to believe his claims. They began to believe that he truly was the Savior foretold by God. This camp of people put all of their hope and trust in him to save them from their oppressors. The people at the time were very oppressed by their government. Their hope was in this proclaimed Savior to deliver them from their oppression, which they presumed to be the harsh government regime under which they lived. Another camp despised this man. They hated his claims that he was a savior, that he was the messiah proclaimed by God. They were jealous that he was gathering such a following and decided to have him killed. The jealous people were successful. They successfully got one of his good friends to betray him and eventually this "Messiah" was condemned to death on a Cross, the worst form of death possible. The man was beaten beyond recognition, his hands and feet were nailed to a Cross, scorned, condemned, and mocked. Then, the man proclaimed... it is finished. The man died.

Evil had won. It was over, it was finished.... the man said so himself. Those who put their hope in this "Messiah" had to be incredibly dejected. This man that they had spent years following and had given up all their material possessions (including family and friends ) to follow had let them down. He was crucified. He was dead. They were still under oppression. That was the end of hope for them. They had believed a lie, they had wasted their time following someone who didn't fulfill his end of the bargain. Depression set in. It was over. It was finished. Hope was lost.

Three days later, this man rose from the dead. He conquered death. Hope was restored! It wasn't over, it was merely beginning! This man proved Himself the Messiah and the Son of God that He claimed to be all along. Hope was restored! His followers were freed from oppression, though not the kind of oppression they expected to be freed from. His followers were able to rejoice! Their efforts, their sacrifices had not been in vain! Hope was restored!

Ever feel dejected and broken down? Ever feel like life just kicks you in the face? Ever choose to follow something only to feel like that choice wasn't worth it in comparison to everything you have given up for that choice?

HOPE WAS RESTORED! Don't give up. The Messiah, the Savior has risen from the dead! We can have faith in God's sovereignty and His plans in our life when things are incredibly hard because of this fact. The Savior has risen from the dead. He was not defeated and neither will we be. Don't give up. Don't lose hope. Focus on Him who conquered unbelievable odds for our redemption. We have the freedom to not falter in our faith, to trust that God knows what He is doing even when times are really really hard, because His Son conquered death.

The enemy is defeated. HOPE IS RESTORED!

A girly entry.... guys beware.

I am here typing on my computer because I am too lazy to write all this out. Ha, I love the speed of typing sometimes!

Okay, here is a good story. Listen up.

So, there is a boy. I like this boy. Through certain circumstances I now have surmised this boy might like me. Okay, this sounds so ridiculous...but there are good lessons to come, I promise. After surmising this boy liked me .... it was REALLY hard to guard my heart. I was living in anticipation. Being super girly and not being patient at all. I talked to a good friend today and that friend assured me that whoever God brings along for me, it will be worth waiting for. Now, I knew I would wait for this boy to initiate, if he decides to do so.... but the wait being worth it wasn't something I had quite considered. Waiting can be a joy, instead of just something to bear through. Affirming his manhood in waiting is worth it to me, whoever it is that decides to pursue me someday.


Also, I have realized that even if this guy likes me and never acts upon it.... God is trustworthy. God holds the hearts of kings in His hands. I trust His plan. He holds the heart of this guy in his hand and this guy trusts and listens to Jesus. If said guy is going to initiate something, it will be in His timing. If said guy never initiates anything, I am okay because God knows what He is doing. I think it was hard for me to overcome the fact that he perhaps likes me, yet may never do anything about it.... but even in that God is trustworthy. Seek first His kingdom and righteousness and all these things will be added to You.

God is trustworthy. God is good. I love Him!

Yay for being a girl and learning to trust God in waiting!


K-Rae

Rant....

"Teach us to be community, Jesus.
Teach us to be community.
Unify our hearts as one.
Unify our hearts as one." Ross King

What does community look like? It is something I have been pondering a lot lately and something I find very, very, very, very, very lacking in our American society. People here don't even know what true community looks like in order to seek after it. Those of us who have been truly blessed with genuine community, our hearts cannot forget it and our hearts cannot settle for less. I admit I miss it so. I miss being able to truly be yourself with someone, sins and all because you know they will extend the mercy and love of Jesus to you. I miss praying together with the girls in my life and really sharing our hearts and lives with one another. I miss the selfless love that comes from knowing the needs of others and being able to fill them. Oh what we are missing out on. "How beautiful is it when brothers dwell together in unity". We don't know what dwelling together looks like in this individualistic society of ours. Please help me to cultivate true community in those believers around me. Oh Jesus, by your mercy.... please teach us to be community.

Randon.... so random I can't even spell it correctly.

I have so many thoughts floating around in this head of mine, so these will just be "randon" bullet points of things I have been learning lately or thinking about lately....

*The overarching theme of these past couple of weeks is to seek God first and His Kingdom first and everything else will be added. I have been learning this as I struggle through what it looks like to possibly be graduating single and struggling through what friendship and community really looks like.

*I have realized more of the amazing and never-ending love of Christ. He did not make a mistake in choosing me for this impossible task. He wouldn't dare throw his pearls to the pigs and thus I know that He wouldn't give such a precious treasure (salvation) to someone He didn't mean to. He wants to do unthinkable and amazing things through me if I will just surrender and trust His divine choice, even though I so often feel unworthy.

*A fresh take on bread and wine. Last Sunday we took communion and I was overwhelmed at reality of His body and blood. His body and blood are what have sustained me through this past month or so - and that is moving beyond belief. I am so thankful for the tangible representation of communion that we are able to partake in to remember and rejoice in His sacrifice.

*God asking us to be obedient isn't because He is just some slave driver in the sky. He really desires our obedience because it is what is best for us as well as Him. Our true obedience is our true joy. Obedience isn't just done for the sake of obeying, it is done to take one step deeper into the heart of God.

Well, those are just a few "randon" thoughts. I hope they drew you closer to our glorious Dad!

Kels